What You Lose When You Prepare for Fear

My preparation game was on point, homie!

I stockpiled canned goods.
I boarded up my windows.
I increased my cardio to make sure I could run for extended periods.
I got rid of excess clothing and shoes so only the necessities were left.

I did everything I could think of doing in preparation for the inevitable…

But it turns out it wasn’t inevitable at all.
Turns out I was not preparing; I was wasting my time.

And I know from your emails and calls that I am not alone.
You sometimes hash out an air-tight devastation preparation game too.

You manage your expectations based on one tricky assumption:
It’s better to prepare for the worst than to expect everything to work out for the best.

You and I sometimes get caught in the “Would Be Nice” net.

It would be nice if he treated me well…but just in case he doesn’t, let me not trust him fully.

It would be nice if I could have my own successful business…but just in case it doesn’t happen, let me slave away at someone else’s dream and keep one eye open for opportunities.

It would be nice if I could invest in my dreams more…but just in case my money stays low like it is now, let me buy fly clothes and fuss over my hair instead.

It would be nice if I could change the flow of my day to match how I want to feel…but just in case that reality is reserved for rich people, let me go on ahead and power through these stressors and count my blessings just like all those strong women who came before me.

Did you catch that? That last one could easily be mislabeled as a sign of resilience and feminine power, couldn’t it?


Instead, it is a chip off an old boulder called FEAR, and it was intentionally doled out to you and to me long before we showed up on the planet as the women we are today. It’s ancient; it spans generations; and it’s the longtime murderer of potentially fulfilling lives.

Stop living as if the worst is far more likely than the best.
Stop mentally preparing for devastation in the name of past experience.
Stop reserving REAL JOY for later in life when your time, money, or man is right.

START planning for what you desire, not what you fear.
Release the murderer of its duties by being that new generation of woman.

That new generation of woman is still afraid, but not deterred. For her, pressing on is not about powering through her stress, accepting mediocrity in her relationships, or muting her thoughts to make other people comfortable. She is constantly seeking counsel from herSELVES.

That new generation of woman knows why her mother, grandmother, and all the elders before her, lived mostly in devastation preparation mode, and uses that to fuel her own mode of living; the direct opposite of her elders’ mindset.

You and I must see ourselves as that new generation of woman by shifting from survival mode to expecting joy, success and fulfillment. We do this by protecting our right to self-expression in our homes, in our relationships and in what we do to earn a living.

If you believed what you just read, how would your life be different?
And if you want to experience that difference, what can you do to walk in that direction today?

I cannot personally walk that walk for you, nor can I help you feel how you want to feel. But I can certainly help you explore your limiting beliefs and create a new environment for that new generation of you to finally flourish. Click on the Voice Lessons logo below to find out how.

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